What is “Internal Government”?
In my own words, “internal government” is the mature, self-regulating system within a person that guides their choices and behavior, even when no one is watching. It’s the inner voice of reason, conscience, and self-control that develops over time.
Think of it as moving from being a country ruled by a strict, external monarch to becoming a stable, self-governing democracy. The “laws” are no longer just commands from an outside authority; they have been internalized—understood, agreed with, and adopted as one’s own principles. This internal government is powered by:
- Self-discipline: The ability to do what you know is right, even when you don’t feel like it.
- A moral compass: An internalized sense of right and wrong, built from values learned over time.
- Forethought: The capacity to consider the potential consequences of your actions on yourself and others.
- Emotional regulation: The skill of managing your feelings so they don’t dictate your behavior in a destructive way.
It’s the difference between a child who doesn’t grab a toy because an adult is watching and will punish them, and an adult who doesn’t steal because they believe it’s wrong and it would harm another person. The first is controlled by an external government; the second is guided by their own internal government.
My Reaction to the Idea
I find the concept of an internal government to be a profoundly positive and essential one. It represents the very definition of maturity and emotional intelligence. Without it, a person remains a perpetual child, entirely dependent on external forces—rules, authorities, or the fear of punishment—to keep them in line. They are not truly free; they are simply controlled.
A well-developed internal government is the foundation of:
- True Independence: It allows you to navigate the world based on your own values, not just a reaction to external pressures.
- Strong Character: It’s the source of integrity, honesty, and reliability. It means your actions align with your principles, building trust with others and self-respect within yourself.
- Healthy Relationships: It enables you to be considerate, to compromise, and to manage conflict without needing an external judge to mediate every disagreement.
So, I see the development of a robust internal government not just as a good thing, but as the primary goal of growing up.
Is it Better for Children to Always Have an Authority Watching Them?
No, I believe it is not better for children to always have someone in authority watching and taking charge. In fact, doing so would be detrimental to their long-term development. If a child is perpetually managed by an external force, their own internal government never gets a chance to form.
Here’s why a balance is crucial:
- External Control is a Temporary Scaffold: For young children, external authority is absolutely necessary. They have no internal government yet. A parent or caregiver is the “external government” that keeps them safe and teaches them the basic rules of life. This is the teaching phase.
- The Goal is Transition: The purpose of this external control isn’t to be permanent. It’s to gradually transfer that authority from the outside to the inside. A good parent doesn’t just say “don’t do that”; they explain why (“because it will hurt him,” “because it’s not kind”). They are essentially writing the first draft of the child’s internal laws.
- Practice Makes Perfect: A child needs opportunities to practice using their fledgling internal government. This means giving them age-appropriate freedom and witnessing the results of their own choices. If they are never allowed to make a small mistake (like forgetting their homework) because a parent is always there to manage it for them, they never learn the natural consequences that help shape their internal decision-making.
- The Risk of External Dependence: A child who is constantly monitored and controlled learns to behave only when under surveillance. They may become skilled at following rules to avoid punishment but fail to develop their own moral reasoning. When the authority figure is gone, their behavior can fall apart because they have no internal compass to guide them. This is often seen in children who go off to college and have no idea how to manage their time or resist peer pressure because a parent always did it for them.
Therefore, the healthiest approach is a gradual release of control. It starts with firm external authority for safety and basic instruction, then slowly shifts toward guidance, discussion, and granting increasing freedom. This allows the child’s “internal government” to practice, make mistakes in a safe environment, and ultimately become strong enough to govern on its own. The ultimate success of parenting or teaching is to make their external authority unnecessary.
